The Amazing Race 14: Recaps To Finale

Previously on The Amazing Race – Our Parents Will Cry Themselves to Death”: Luke made a bitchass move and pushed one of the sistahs so she called him a bitch. He didn’t hear it, but his Mama told him and then it was on! At the pit stop, Margie lost her shit when she thought Kisha was laughing at Luke because he’s deaf. Oh, and the shorty-do-wops were eliminated. Finally!

Previously on The Amazing Race- “Having a Baby’s Gotta Be Easier Than This”: The teams get foot massages from hell in China and Jen provides this season’s reality show stereotype – black folks can’t swim. The episode ends with a cliffhanger as the first team to the pit stop finds out that the leg of the race is still going.

Previously on The Amazing Race – “He Made Me Look Like Alice Cooper”: The race continues. The teams have to eat gross stuff like fried starfish. I just studied starfish anatomy in biology and I know what their gonads look like. I wouldn’t have eaten it. Just sayin’. Victor and Tammy use the final U-Turn on Kisha and Jen… but that doesn’t cause them to lose the race. Jen stopping to pee when she knew there was another team behind them is what cost them the race. I want to kick her in the teeth.

For one million bucks you PISS YOUR PANTS!

My two picks to win are out. Donny’s pick, Tammy and Victor, are still in. The finale is up next.

The final three teams fly to Hawaii where they have to season, carry, and then prep a pig for a luau. Tammy struggles carrying the pig. I never understand people that can’t suck it up doing the painful things. Maybe it’s because I’ve been through labor twice. Maybe it’s because I really like money. Either way, I want to drop-kick Tammy into the ocean every time she drops the pig and cries.

Margie and Luke finish first and take off for their next clue… on a water scooter… bike… thingie. Then they race to a highway with a fence made of surfboard. One team member has to put the surfboards in order of tasks they completed/places they visited. Luke starts off doing it really well as he’s been prepping for it the entire game.

Jaime and Cara get lost… again. Their cabbie gets on the phone to ask for help. Tammy and Victor get stuck behind a slow car. Meanwhile, Luke is flying through the surfboards. The person the cabbie called for help is on speakerphone and doesn’t appreciate Jaime’s nasty attitude. She, finally, puts her in her damn place! Leave it to an American to tell that bitch where to go.

Luke has a great head start, but the other two teams catch up. He can’t figure out the last two boards, Jaime can’t figure out the first, Victor smokes them all. Tammy and Victor leave for the finish line and the remaining two teams work together to finish the puzzle.

Tammy and Victor win! And even though Donny will never shut up about predicting the winners from episode one, I am happy they won because I hated those remaining two teams.

Lost Season 5 – Epis. 10 & 11: He’s Our You & Whatever Happened, Happened

Previously on Lost: Ben was sweating The Others even as a kid. Sayid worked for Ben when he was off the island, killing people he believed worked for Widmore. Back on the island, Sayid is captured by the Dharma Initiative. Young Ben befriends Sayid.

And now…

Tikrit, Iraq – As a boy, Sayid killed chickens without flinching. He makes his fat friend look like a pussy.

On the island – Young Ben brings Sayid more food and a book. (A Separate Reality by Carlos Castaneda) Ben wants to know if Richard sent Sayid. He says when he ran away four years ago, Richard told him to be patient and he could join them. He tells Sayid that if he’s patient too, he can help him.

When he was off the island, Sayid kills a man from Widmore’s organization. Ben tells him that he has killed them all and he’s free to go live his life.

Back on the island, Horace comes to see Sayid, but Sayid ain’t talking. He gives Sayid an hour to change his mind or they’re taking it to the next level. Oooh.

From their happy home, Juliet and Sawyer watch Kate and Jack from the window. She worries that life as they know it will be over once Sayid opens his mouth. Sawyer says that Sayid won’t blab. Horace comes over and says that Sayid ain’t talking and they’re gonna be forced to sic Oldham on Sayid. Sawyer wants a shot at him.

Sawyer goes to see Sayid alone, ordering the guard to leave. Sayid wants to know how Sawyer can live with a mini-Ben Linus. Sawyer says they have no choice. Sawyer tells Sayid that he’s lucky he spent the last three years getting himself into a position to help him now. He strikes Sayid and says they need to pretend he was interrogated and that Sayid needs to say he wants to defect from The Others. Sayid refuses.

Hurley is a cook on the island. Go figure. He joins Jack and Kate for breakfast. Kate and Hurley can’t believe Sawyer didn’t give up any info on a plan. Hurley breaks the news to Kate that Juliet and Sawyer are together-together. Like bumping uglies together.

Ben’s father, Roger the janitor, comes to clean up outside of Sayid’s cell. He wonders aloud how Sayid got caught. He figures that Sayid must be pretty dumb. Sayid is all, “At least I’m not a janitor.” Ben shows up with a sandwich and plays like it’s for his Daddy. Roger goes all Daddy Dearest on him ’cause he knows the sandwich is for Sayid.

Off the island, in Santo Domingo, Ben comes to see Sayid. He tells Sayid that John Locke is dead, probably murdered… ’cause you killed him, bastard! He tells Sayid that he might be in danger and that men are watching Hurley too. Sayid realizes that Ben wants him to kill the men watching Hurley. Sayid insists he doesn’t like killing.

Sawyer and the others come for Sayid and tazer him. I love a good tazin’, but not on Sayid! They take him to Oldham; a rednecky old coot. Sawyer tells Sayid, “He’s our you.” They tie Sayid to a tree and Oldham forces him to swallow a cube of sugar with some liquid on it. Oldham tells Sayid that no matter what, he will tell them the truth.

Sawyer shits his pants.

Off the island, at the marina, Sayid is pissed when he realizes that he, Sun, Kate, and Jack have gathered with Ben to discuss going back to the island. “If I see you again,” he tells Ben, “it will be unpleasant for us both.”

At a hotel bar, Sayid downs scotch that’s $120 bucks a glass. Damn. Murder pays well. Elana is seated at the bar too and starts coming on to him. He buys her a glass of the scotch. Yeah, murder pays real well.

On the island, the questioning begins. Sayid answers the questions honestly. He was in handcuffs on the plane because he’s a bad man. He tells them he has returned to the island. He tells them about the first crash. He also tells them what he knows about all the stations. That freaks Radzinski the hell out. Sayid then tells them that they are all going to die. When he tells them he’s from the future they think Oldham used too much of the drug.

Juliet shows Kate around the garage where they work on the vans. Juliet is relieved that Hurley told Kate about her and Sawyer because if she had done it, she knew it would sound like she was telling Kate to stay away. Which we all know is what she wants to say.

They then watch as Sawyer and crew lead Sayid back to his cell.

Sawyer notices Juliet and Kate talking.

The DI peeps have a come to Jesus meeting and Radzinski pushes for Sayid to be killed. Sawyer wants to talk to Sayid again, but Radzinski smells blood. He says they need to make a decision or he will call Ann Arbor and they will make it for them. Another reason I won’t take my black ass to Michigan. Amy pushes for the vote. She won’t feel safe with Sayid around. They vote and everyone, including Sawyer, vote to kill Sayid.

Sawyer, say it ain’t so!

Off the island, Sayid and Elana are about to get down and dirty in a hotel room. She suddenly starts beating his ass and pulls a gun on him. She was hired to bring him to Guam to answer for killing the guy on the golf course.

Back on the island, Sawyer goes to see Sayid again and tells him that they’re coming to kill him. Again Sayid refuses Sawyer’s plan to escape. Sayid says that he realizes he has a purpose for being back on the island. Frustrated, Sawyer leaves. He goes to see Kate. He wants to know why they came back to the island. She says she only knows why she came back. Before she can say, “I came back for your fine ass,” a van on fire plows into a house.

Kate  helps people escape from the house while Sawyer rushes to get the hoses going. Sawyer tells Jack that the trouble only started when they brought their asses back.

While this is going on, young Ben sneaks to see Sayid. He asks Sayid, “If I let you go, will you take me with you? To your people?” Sayid tells him yes.

Off the island, as Elana escorts Sayid through the airport, he notices Hurley, Kate, and Jack. He wants to take another plane, but Elana ain’t having it. Sayid sees Sun and knows shit ain’t right. He knows shit really ain’t right when he sees Ben. He asks Elana if she’s working for Benjamin Linus. She wants to know who Ben is. Sayid says he’s a monster, liar, etc. She wants to know why she’d work for someone like that. Sayid admits that he worked for Ben.

On the island, Sayid and Ben are running through the woods when they come across Jin in a van.

Sayid tells Jin that Sawyer let him go. Jin wants to call and check on this before letting Sayid go on, but Sayid knocks him out before he can. He then takes Jin’s gun and shoots Ben.

Damn, he was right. That was unpleasant.

He shoulda shot his ass more than once!

Whatever Happened, Happened

Previously on Lost: Sawyer finds out he has a daughter named Clementine. Kate, before ending up on the island the first time, encounters Sawyer’s baby mama. Kate pretends to be Aaron’s mother after leaving the island. She is threatened by someone who knows Aaron isn’t hers. Young Ben lets Sayid escape and gets a cap in his ass for his efforts.

And now…

Jin comes to and tells the DI people that Sayid is headed north. He then discovers that Ben is shot and puts him in the van. What? Let that little bastard die! And did he give up Sayid’s true direction?

Back at the DI camp, Horace says that someone must have set the fire to help Sayid escape. Jack is like, “How you know that?” And Horace pretty much tells him to shut up, newbie.

Kate helps Ben’s father, Roger, move the burnt out van from the house. She realizes that he’s Ben’s father. Jin shows up with an injured Ben. Roger freaks out.

Off the island, Kate takes Aaron to see Sawyer’s baby mama. She wants to know why Kate trusted her with the secret that Sawyer is still alive. She tells Kate that Sawyer is a coward. She also figures out that Kate isn’t Aaron’s Mommy.

Back on the island, Sawyer is looking at the surveillance cameras. Kate shows up and Sawyer tells Kate to scram before she messes everything up. Sure enough, Horace and crew shows up and Saywer acts like he was questioning Kate.

They realize that someone with janitor keys let Sayid out. There are only three janitors; some guy, Roger, and Jack. Sawyer and Miles leave to question Jack.

Sawyer tells Miles to get Jack, Kate, and Hurley and put them in a house and watch them. He goes to see how Ben is and realizes that Roger doesn’t have his janitor keys. Juliet tells Sawyer that she needs a real surgeon to stop Ben’s bleeding.

At the house, Miles tells Hurley, Jack, and Kate that Ben won’t die because he lived to be an adult. Sawyer shows up and says they need Jack, and if he doesn’t come, Ben will die. Jack refuses.

Later, Kate can’t believe Jack won’t save Ben. Jack says that he already saved Ben for Kate’s ass once, and he ain’t doing it again. Jack thinks that the island might just want to work shit out for itself. Kate doesn’t like the new Jack. Jack says you didn’t like the old Jack.

Kate goes to donate blood for Ben. She tells Juliet that she and Jack were engaged off the island after Juliet expresses confusion over Jack’s unwillingness to help Ben. Roger comes in and sits with Kate while Juliet checks on Ben.

Roger admits that Ben stole his keys to bust out Sayid because of him. Roger confides in Kate  how Ben’s mother died. Then Ben goes into shock.

Back at the house, Hurley has a hard time wrapping his brain around the fact that everything that is happening now, already happened. Miles keeps calling Hurley names.

Miles explains that when Ben turned the wheel time is no longer on a straight line. What follows is a bunch of time-travel mumbo jumbo that gives me a headache. Hurley does succeed in stumping Miles. He wants to know if everything has already happened, how come Ben doesn’t remember being shot by Sayid when he first meets him after the Oceanic crash. (Just like I wanted to know why Daniel didn’t remember telling Charlotte never to return to the island.)

Juliet tells Kate that Ben will die and Kate says they can’t let that happen. Juliet says that maybe there’s something The Others can do. Oooh, does this mean we get to see Richard’s fine ass? Please say yes.

Juliet and Kate sneak Ben into a van. Kate doesn’t want Juliet going with her. Juliet tells her that when Sawyer finds out, she will give Kate a head start.

Off the island, at the marina, Kate is pissed when she realizes they met with Ben to discuss going back to the island. She leaves with Aaron. They go to a supermarket because he’s thirsty. When Jack calls Kate on her cell, she takes her eyes off of Aaron briefly and he disappears. I would so beat Donny’s ass. She finds him with a woman that says she was taking Aaron for help.

On the island, Kate makes it to the security pylons when Sawyer shows up. He says he’s not there to stop her, he’s there to help her. And he calls her Freckles!!

Off the island, Kate goes back to Sawyer’s baby mama. Clementine calls her Auntie Kate. She tells the baby mama that Jack and the others want to go back. She also tells baby mama that as scared as she was when Aaron went missing, she also expected it. Baby mama tells Kate that Sawyer broke her heart so she took Aaron to fix it.

On the island, Sawyer disables the pylons. Sawyer says he is helping Ben for Juliet because she said that no matter what Ben grows up to be, it’s wrong to let a kid die. Sheeeit.

Juliet busts into the house and wants to see Jack who is in the shower. She makes Miles and Hurley leave. She confronts Jack for not helping Ben. Juliet says that Sawyer and Kate actually care and he doesn’t. He says that he cares, that’s why he came back. To save her. She says she didn’t need saving. She’s been playing house with Sawyer, and likes it! He says he came back because he was supposed to, but he doesn’t know why yet.

Sawyer and Kate carry Ben through the jungle. She tells Sawyer about Clementine. Sawyer tells Kate that they would have never worked out. He wasn’t fit to be her man or a Dad. Kate points out that he seems to be doing fine with Juliet. He says he’s grown up a lot in three years.

The Others show up and Sawyer tells them that they need to take Ben to Richard.

Off the island, Kate goes to see Clare’s mother. She tells her that Aaron is her grandson and that Clare is alive. Kate admits that she didn’t say anything sooner because she needed Aaron. Kate says that she told Aaron she’s his grandmother and that she will take care of him. Kate is going back to the island to find Clare.

As Kate cries over Aaron while he sleeps, I’m about to lose my shit… until Donny says, “It took her three years to feel like shit?”

Way to ruin the moment!

On the island, Sawyer brings Ben to Richard… who seems to appear out of nowhere. He also appears to still be young and sexy.

Kate asks if Richard can save Ben’s life. Richard kinda looks at Kate like he wants to eat her. Lucky girl. Richard says that if he takes Ben, he will never be the same. He won’t remember what happened, his innocence will be gone, and Ben will always be one of them.

Creepy.

“You still want me to take him?”

Kate says, “Yes.”

An other says that they need to ask Ellie (Daniel’s Mom?), and worries what will happen if Charles (Widmore) finds out… Damn, he looks like a young, and HOT, eyepatch guy. Richard says he doesn’t answer to either of them. Richard leaves with Ben and takes him to the temple where the smoke monster lives.

Older, current, Ben wakes up to find John staring at him.

Next week looks kickass!

 

Battlestar Galactica: Season 4.5 – Epi. 11: Sometimes A Great Notion

Before we jump into the final season’s premiere, let’s do a review. Here are the top ten things you need to know about Battlestar Galactica:

1. The fate of the human race is in jeopardy – In the pilot episode, the 12 colonies of humanity were wiped out by the Cylons. Cylons were robots designed by the humans for military defense, but evolved (now look human) and revolted. They killed billions of people in an attack on the 12 colonies of Kobol including Caprica.

2. Admiral Adama leads the colonists in a search for Earth – Battlestar Galactica, commanded by Admiral Adama (Edward James Olmos), is the only battlestar to survive the attack and leads the surviving fleet (about 50,000 ppl) in search of the mythical planet Earth. Legend goes that the 13th colonists fled many years ago and settled on Earth. They hope that there will be life there. The Cylons are hot on their asses.

3. The Galactica crew is a family – Adama and President Laura Roslin (Mary McDonald) are like the mother/father figures of the surviving fleet. Roslin was the Secretary of Education when the attack happened, and the 43 people in line ahead of her to be President all died in the attack. She more than rises to the occasion. Laura and Adama have grown close.

Colonel Saul Tigh is Adama’s best friend and the executive officer of Galactica.

Lee Adama is Admiral Adama’s son and a fighter pilot aboard Galactica. They had an uneasy relationship. Kara Thrace a.k.a Starbuck is the best pilot in the fleet. She dated Adama’s dead son, Zach, who died in combat. Lee Adama and Starbuck had affairs while being married to other people. Lee to Dualla (Galactica officer) and Starbuck to Anders, a surviver from Caprica.

Dr. Gaius Baltar was duped into letting the Cylons into the nation’s defense system which helped the Cylons launch their attack.

4. Cylons look like us now - There are 12 models of human-looking Cylons. And there are thousands of each model that are copies. If you kill one, the body dies but its consciousness is instantly downloaded into a new body (identical to the one that died) aboard one of their resurrection ships. Caprica 6 (the sixth model) is the one that seduced Baltar into getting into the defense system.

5. The President is dying – President Laura Roslin is dying of cancer. There is a Pithean prophecy that the new leader will be dying and will lead humanity to their new home. The relationship between Adama and Roslin has deepened over time. She has told Adama, finally, that she loves him.

6. There are Cylons within the Galactica crew - There were sleeper Cylons within the fleet that didn’t know they were Cylons. Sharon (call sign Boomer), a Galactica pilot, started to become unglued and realized she was a Cylon.

On Cylon-occupied Caprica, a Sharon Cylon was tasked to seduce Helo (another Galactica pilot who landed on Cylon-occupied Caprica to rescue survivors, but stayed behind) and hopefully mate with him and see if Cylons could get pregnant by humans. Helo, at the time, didn’t know the woman he thought was Sharon was actually a Cylon, and that the Sharon he knew was aboard Galactica losing her marbles. When the crew of Galactica finds out that Sharon is a Cylon, someone shoots her. She dies but is resurrected on a Cylon resurrection ship. The Cylon Sharon on Caprica becomes pregnant by Helo, decides she can’t kill him, and joins him aboard Galactica. Essentially, they switched places and lives. Hera, a Cylon-Human child, is born to Helo and the new Sharon, later dubbed the call sign “Athena.”

Over the course of 3 seasons, 7 of the 12 models were revealed to us. At the end of season 3, four of the final five were revealed to be among the fleet. They did not know they were Cylons. They are Anders (Starbuck’s husband), Col. Saul Tigh, Chief Tyrol, and Tory (the President’s assistant.) Hearing a song in their heads led them to a room at the same time where they realize what they are. They decide to hide the fact that they are Cylons. Tory kills Tyrol’s wife when she finds out their secret. Tigh had killed his own wife once he found out that she was colluding with the Cylons so he feels extra dumb to find out he is one.

7. Starbuck has a destiny – “All of this has happened before, and will happen again.” In the third season, Starbuck’s ship exploded and she died. She returned in a new Viper (fighter plane) claiming to have been to Earth. She was gone months to the crew, but only hours to her. She passes the blood test devised by Baltar that proves she is human and not a Cylon, but no one has a plausible explanation for why she blew up and returned.

8. A civil war has split the Cylons - A division has formed between the Cylons in season 3. The rebel Cylons (the 8s, 6s, and 2s) want to find out who the final five are in the hopes of discovering their true destiny. D’Anna (model #3) has seen the final five Cylons, but her model was boxed. The rebel Cylons want to unbox her to find the final five. They want to join forces with the humans in order to do this. The humans are motivated to agree because the final five Cylons have been to Earth and can lead the way. The rebel Cylons are willing to help the humans destroy the resurrection hub, so no more downloading – dead is dead – and while the humans are doing that, they will slip and grab D’Anna, who has been in a kinda cold storage.

9 – Enemies have become allies - The Cylon rebels are looking for meaning and are willing to be just like humans – mortal, to find it. There are members of the human fleet that think it’s a bad idea to trust the Cylons. Tigh confesses to his best friend, Adama, that he is a final five Cylon. Tyrol, Tigh, and Anders all begin hearing the same song again- the one that led them to learn they were Cylons – and this time it leads them to Starbuck’s Viper. They realize that the Viper holds the key to Earth’s location. The Viper’s radar has picked up a Colonial signal which is coming from Earth. The Cylons and humans decide to travel together to Earth by following the beacon.

10. They find Earth – When they arrive on Earth, they find it has been nuked. There is no life to be found. Devastated for thousands of years.

Who is the final Cylon? What happened to Earth? Where are the other Cylons and will they find them? You know they’re pissed off because their resurrection abilities have been destroyed. What happens to the fleet with their new Cylon alliance?

Season 4.5 Episode 11 – Sometimes a Great Notion

10pm – I’m so excited I can barely sit still. As is my habit, I want to celebrate good TV with a bad-for-me meal, but I’ve been dieting and I’m down five pounds. In fact, if I really wanted to celebrate I’d watch tonight’s premiere while on the elliptical, but it’s 1 hour and 4 minutes and that ain’t how I roll. Oooh, it’s on!

Previously on the awesomeness that is Battlestar Galactica: The Cylons have split; the Ones, Fours, and Fives are against the Sixes, Eights, and Twos. Well, Boomer (being a dirty little whore) is sleeping with one of the Ones (Brother Cavil) so she has sided with them. The 6s, 8s, and 2s have teamed up with the Colonial fleet to free Number 3, D’Anna, find the final five within the fleet, and find Earth. Dualla was Lee Adama’s rock even when he was fat and screwing Starbuck. The final four are revealed within the fleet and three of them help Starbuck figure out that her Viper can lead them to Earth. They arrive on Earth to find it decimated by a nuclear explosion. Dumb Earthlings.

Now…

Everyone’s kinda looking around at the nuked Earth like, “WTF?!” Col. Tigh looks out at the ocean with his one good eye. They’re all digging through the sands of the beach in disbelief. President Roslin finds a small plant. Helo reports there are no signs of life on radar… the Cylons concur. Starbuck and Leoben try to find the signal that led them there.

Why is no one concerned with radiation!? Stop touching stuff!

OK, Baltar confirms that the planet was nuked over 2,000 years ago and the radiation level is pretty low. Dualla finds a child’s set of jacks in the sand and loses her shit. It’s sad, but I still wish she would stop touching stuff. I truly believe Dualla is the final Cylon. Now, she’s on board a ship freaking out next to Helo. Poor Cylon Dualla.

10:05 – They have returned to Galactica to tell the rest of the fleet that Earth is to’ up from the flo’ up. President Roslin can’t bring herself to say the words. See, if that were Obama he’d have made an uplifting speech making them all forget that they’re pretty much fucked.

10:10 - Leoben (number 2) and Starbuck try to find the signal. They find a piece of colonial aircraft wreckage instead. Starbuck realizes it’s her ship that exploded when everyone thought she was dead. Oh snap! Dualla babysits Hera for Helo and Athena. Why? I don’t know.

The Cylons unearth the remains of a Centurion in the sand which suggests that they were there 2,000 years ago… but they’re not the same Centurion models that our Cylons are used to. They assume that the Centurions must have revolted against the 13th colony of humans that settled Earth, just as the Cylons did to the 12 colonies back on Kobol… but no! ALL the remains found are Cylon! There were no humans on Earth! The 13th colony was Cylons! Oh double snap!

President Roslin and Admiral Adama are all messed up. They don’t want to talk to anyone. She won’t talk to the Quarum (like our Congress) and Adama won’t talk to Col. Tigh. Who can blame them?

10:15pm – On the beach, Chief Tyrol has a flashback of being a skinjob Cylon on Earth. He was just walking down the street, minding his business, when the nuclear explosion occurred. There’s a scorch mark in his image on a wall. DAMN!

Lee Adama is all depressed thinking about all the pilots that died for the dream of a new beginning on Earth. Their sacrifice is meaningless he worries. Dualla tells him to man up and they make a date to have dinner that night.

10:20 – Starbuck and Leoben find her downed Viper. It’s blown to shit. Inside they find her dead body. WTF!!? She confesses that the Cylon hybrid told her she was the harbinger of death and would lead humanity to it’s end. Leoben runs off like a little bitch as Starbuck demands to know, “What am I!!?” You know shit is all kinds of wrong when you freak out a Cylon!

10:25- Anders finds a guitar neck in the sand and remembers playing the song that switched them on for a woman he loved. He tells Tyrol and Tory arrives to say she remembers Anders playing that song for all of them. They wonder how they could have died 2,000 years ago on Earth and end up as sleeper Cylons within the colonies.

President Roslin is burning the Pithean prophecies when Adama finds her aboard Galactica. She’s all down cause people trusted her and followed her to Earth for nothing. She has also stopped taking her cancer treatments. Adama tries to console her, but she ain’t having it.

10:30 – Starbuck burns her dead body on the beach. That’s not something you do everyday. Aboard Galactica, Lee and Dualla finish their date at the door to her quarters. They kiss. Ah, how nice. Wait till he finds out she’s the final Cylon.

Dualla’s all humming and happy as she puts her jewelry in her locker. Lt. Felix Gaeda tells her she’s all glowing. He leaves and she hums, hangs up her wedding ring and then shoots herself in the head. Let me say that one mo’ ‘gain.

Dualla shot herself in the frakkin’ head! What the frak!

Ok, my prediction now is that she’ll return later as the final Cylon. She must have had a memory of herself on Earth when she found the jacks… that’s why she freaked out. She knows killing herself means she resurrects. But no… the major resurrection hub was destroyed… but maybe final five don’t rez like the others. Oh, hell, I don’t know!

10:40 – Lee mourns over Dualla’s sheet-covered dead body. Adama finds him and they wonder what the hell Dualla was smoking. “I don’t frakkin know, ” says Adama. Alone with Dualla, Adama asks, “What did you do?” as he looks at her under the sheet.

Um, it’s pretty obvious what she did. She blew her pretty head off.

Adama storms through the halls of Galactica demanding a loaded sidearm from a nearby soldier. People are all fighting in the halls, garbage is strewn about, the words, “FRAK EARTH” are spray painted on the walls. I expect someone to start singing, “I’d move heaven and Earth to get outta Skid Roooow!”

Adama staggers into Tigh’s quarters drunk. “Sit down, Cylon!” They’re gonna have a heart-to-heart. Ohh, it’s on like Donkey Kong! Adama wonders if Tigh was programmed to be his friend. Adama starts shit-talking Tigh’s dead wife, Ellen. He says she was whore banging half the fleet cause she must have sensed that something was wrong with Tigh. Hmm, maybe. I just think she was that kinda whore. But, whatevs. Tigh threatens to shoot Adama in the head till he realizes that’s what Adama wants. He tells him to man up like Dualla, and do it himself. Atta Cylon!

10:52 – Lee changes the fleet count on the whiteboard to reflect Dualla’s death. Starbuck enters to tell him about the signal and finding her own dead body, but before she can, he tells her about Dualla. She figures finding out that one girl you used to screw is dead is enough for one night and keeps her news to herself.

Adama orders Gaeda to find the nearest star cluster. He’s blowing this dump called Earth. They call the Cylon base ship to see if their new allies want to ride shotgun. Adama gets on the horn and tells the fleet they’re leaving. He neglects to tell them that the 13th colony they idolized and followed to Earth were Cylons.

Back on Earth, Tigh tells everyone to get it together – they’re leaving in 15 minutes. D’Anna says she’s staying on Earth to die with her ancestors. It beats dying in the dark when Cavil (number 1) catches up with the traitorous Cylons. Tigh says he’s sticking with The Old Man (Adama) and he trusts him to find them a new home.

Tigh staggers out into the ocean … I guess to say goodbye? Who knows? Either way, he’s waist deep when he has a flashback to HIS time on Earth….

Chaos, people are screaming… someone is calling him, “Sol!” He finds his wife, Ellen, in some rubble. Nukes are going off in the distance.

“It’s okay,” she tells him, “It’s okay. Everything’s in place. We’ll be reborn. Again. Together.”

The nuke kills them.

It ends with Tigh in the water realizing that Ellen is the final Cylon!

Sonofabitch! I was wrong.

So, what don’t we know?

Where are the rest of the Cylons and how long before they catch up with the fleet and the rebel Cylons? Where the hell is Ellen? Tigh killed her on New Caprica when he found she was boffin’ Brother Cavil (number one) and giving the Cylons info in exchange for his release from a Cylon prison. Where would she resurrect? Where did the final five resurrect when they died 2,000 years ago? Did they design the other seven models? What up with Starbuck?! Why couldn’t she die? For real, I mean. I hate her. More, more, more.

What did you think?

Lost Season 3, Episode 11: Enter 77

If you have answers to questions, have your own theories, or want to speculate on anything I’ve mentioned feel free to do so below… if not, that’s okay too. This is to help me remember stuff about the show as the seasons go on.

Synopsis:

Locke, Danielle, Sayid, and Kate find the Russian Eye Patch Guy on his farm. He tells them that he is the last surviving member of the Dharma Iniaitive. Via flashbacks Sayid is kidnapped and held by the husband of a woman he tortured during his time in the Iraqi forces.

Cool Stuff

- The scene where the woman Sayid tortured confronts him is so powerful.

Things To Throw Us Off That Later Turned Out to Mean Jack-Shit

Revelations
Knowing What We Know Now and Observations of Continuity:

Silly Nina Noticed Stuff:
The Unexplained That’s Still Unexplained:

Sawyerisms

Trivia:

1. What game does Locke play on Eyepatch’s computer?

2. What job does Sayid hold when he is kidnapped?

3. Eyepatch named his cat what?

Lost Season 2, Episode 11: The Hunting Party

If you have answers to questions, have your own theories, or want to speculate on anything I’ve mentioned feel free to do so below… if not, that’s okay too. This is to help me remember stuff about the show as the seasons go on.

Synopsis:

Locke, Jack, and Sawyer head off after Michael when he leaves to search for Walt.  Via flashbacks we learn about the end of Jack’s marriage.

Cool Stuff

Things To Throw Us Off That Later Turned Out to Mean Jack-Shit

Revelations

- Jack and Locke meet Tom for the first time.

- The best part of this episode was Jack coming back from his confrontation with The Others thoroughly pissed off and finally ready to do something about it. He asks Ana Lucia, “How long do you think it would take to train an army?”

Knowing What We Know Now and Observations of Continuity:

Silly Nina Noticed Stuff:

- Kate is an annoying twat.

The Unexplained That’s Still Unexplained:

Sawyerisms

Mr. Clean – Locke

Daniel Boone – Locke

Zeke – Tom
Trivia:

1. Jack’s wife has what kind of scare at the episode’s start?

2. Who trails Locke, Jack, and Sawyer when they go after Michael?

Lost Season, Episode 11: Whatever the Case May Be

If you have answers to questions, have your own theories, or want to speculate on anything I’ve mentioned feel free to do so below… if not, that’s okay too. This is to help me remember stuff about the show as the seasons go on.

Synopsis:

Kate and Sawyer discover a locked case while swimming. Kate is determined to get into the case, but Sawyer won’t give it up. Sayid enlists Shannon’s help deciphering the French documents he took from Danielle’s.

Cool Stuff

Things To Throw Us Off That Later Turned Out to Mean Jack-Shit

Knowing What We Know Now and Observations of Continuity:

Silly Nina Noticed Stuff:

- Kate’s backstories are always so lame. In this one she helps some guys rob a bank. Zzzzzzz.

The Unexplained That’s Still Unexplained:

Sawyerisms

Trivia:

1. Where is the key for the case?

2. What was in the case that Kate wanted?

3. What name did Kate use while robbing the bank?

4. Who finally gets through to Charlie after Claire is taken?