24 Day 7: 5pm-6pm

Previously on 24: The First Hubby is shot during the rescue attempt. The President reaches out to her estranged daughter. Colonel Dubaku lets his American cohorts know that if he’s captured or killed, their names will be exposed. Jack convinces Marika to go to Dubaku so they can apprehend him. The leak in the FBI, Sean a.k.a. Squirrelly Guy, arranges for Jack and Agent Walker’s arrest to buy Dubaku some time. Dubaku is tipped off that Marika is working with Jack.

The following takes place between 5pm and 6pm:

Sean is at his desk looking both Squirrelly and proud of himself. His mistress confronts him about the warrant he put out on Jack and Agent Walker. He tells her to calm the hell down. Seems he’s not the only mole.  He tells her to sit her ass down somewhere and act normal.

Jack and Agent Walker are cuffed and put into the back of a police car.

Marika arrives at Dubaku and he confronts her. He smashes her cell phone and insists that the FBI is lying on him. He says he has brought peace to Sangala. He forgives her and wants her to still go with him. She agrees. I want to slap her, but I’m distracted by how fabulous her hair looks.
She deserves whatever happens to her dumb ass after this.

Note: Sophie thinks Marika looks like the turtle you are challenged to draw in those ads in the back of magazines.

The misunderstanding with the police is all cleared up and Jack and Agent Walker are allowed to go. They find out their cell phone trace on Marika went dead and Chloe uses traffic cameras to find out which way Dubaku is headed. Dubaku’s inside contact isn’t happy to hear that Marika is going with Dubaku. Dubaku is all, “I can handle my bitches, thank you very much.”

Jack and Agent Walker catch up to Dubaku and a car chase ensues. I hate car chases so I tune it out. Jack crashes and Dubaku is getting away. Jack tells Agent Walker to try and maintain a visual on Dubaku’s car until they can get a new ride.

Marika comes to her senses, kinda, and causes the car to crash by attacking the driver. Jack and Agent Walker take off on foot towards the accident. The driver gets out and goes for his gun. Jack and Agent Walker light.his.ass.up. Jack grabs Dubaku as Agent Walker tries to pull Marika free. Jack warns that the car is on fire and she needs to stop. She pulls a gun on Jack saying she gave her word nothing would happen to Marika and he can either help or back off. Not wanting a cap in his ass, Jack helps. They pull Marika free just before the car blows up. Dubaku, who is lying right next to the damn thing, doesn’t catch fire. Lame.

At the hospital, the President is informed that they have liberated 10,000 civilians in Sangala, but she ain’t tryna hear it. She’s worried about her husband and upset that she didn’t listen to him when he tried to tell her that their son didn’t kill himself. Bill informs her that Jack has apprehended Dubaku and that he is hurt. If he dies, the names of the conspirators may die with him. Bill wants her to return to the White House, but she wants to stay. She is finally convinced to return. She wonders how she can run the government when she doesn’t know who to trust.

At the scene Dubaku is stabilized and the paramedics want to take him to the hospital. Jack convinces them to give him a shot of adrenaline so he can question Dubaku. He does this by being all growly and scary. Jack threatens Dubaku’s family and Dubaku tells him there’s a list of names, but then he codes. The paramedics bring him back, but note there is some kind of metal disc in Dubaku’s chest.

Jack has Dubaku cut open and pulls it out. PIMP.

He calls Moss and informs him of the disc. Squirrelly Guy (Sean) is listening to the whole conversation.  Jack gets a cop in a helicopter to transport the bloody disc to Moss. He takes it with no questions and seemingly no concern for the blood on his hands. Ewww.

Squirrelly Sean corners his mistress in the bathroom and tells her about the disc. She starts freaking out and yelling at him for getting her into this mess and not leaving his wife. Bitch, focus! He tells her that as soon as Chloe downloads the info, they will crash the entire system. That’s crazy talk, she says. But agrees after he rubs on her face and smooth talks her. Ugh. He’s not even cute.

At the hospital, Agent Walker is all messed up over what happened to Marika and takes it out on Jack.

When Chloe sees the disc she realizes that it has an auto-erase function; they only get one download.

Sean and his mistress prepare to wipe the system. He speaks with Dubaku’s contact and warns that he needs to take care of Dubaku because he’s taking care of the disc.  Once the erase begins, Sean kills his mistress and then shoots himself in the arm. When Moss and Chloe arrive, Sean blames everything on the mistress. Chloe informs Moss that all of Dubaku’s files were destroyed.

Moss believes Sean’s squirrelly ass and fills him in on what’s going on. Chloe calls Moss and tells him that she was able to recover Dubaku’s files after all and they’re decrypted. He instructs her to cross reference it with government officials. When he hangs up, he tells Sean the files were accessed and Sean shits his pants. He pretends to be happy. Moss tells him he’ll need to go see a psychiatrist because he shot a fellow agent and that has to be traumatic. Not nearly as traumatic as getting arrested.

Sean heads for the exit, but Moss is on his ass. He demands answers, but Sean asks for an attorney.

Rosa arrives at the hospital and goes off on Agent Walker for letting Marika die. Jack tells Agent Walker that arrests are being made based on Dubaku’s list. It’s over. Agent Walker says it’s not over for Rosa. Jack insists that Marika had a choice and she chose to help. Agent Walker starts slapping Jack asking if he feels anything. He lets her get in two good slaps before gripping her ass up. She cries in his arms. He tells her she’ll learn to live with it and she says she doesn’t want to.

He turns to leave and but tells her, “That little stunt you pulled by the car… if you ever pull your weapon on me again, you better intend to use it.”

“I did.”

Jack nods. Respect.

OK. This is getting tied up a little too neatly and too quickly. The day ain’t even half over. Where’s the other shoe, and when will it drop?

At the White House, the President informs her daughter that she cannot go to the hospital to be with First Hubby. Daughter throws a temper tantrum. Bill tells the President that Dubaku’s list was recovered. Bill wants the President to speak to the Senator heading up the hearings against Jack. Her ungrateful ass says she has to think about it.

Jack is chilling outside the White House when Tony shows up. He whispers that there will be another attack on the U.S. by Dubaku’s boss. The chief-of-staff of the senator heading up Jack’s hearing is involved. Jack warns Tony that if he’s lying… Tony asks Jack to meet him on a street corner if he’s down for whatever. He never once asked why Tony was whispering.

The senator’s chief-of-staff turns out to be none other than Dubaku’s contact, Ryan! The senator gets a call that the President wants to meet with him regarding Bauer and he wants Ryan there. Ryan gets a message on his phone, “Units in place. Operation on schedule.”

Tick… tock… tick… tock…

24 Day 7: 3-4pm and 4-5pm

Last week’s recap is included here because I was sick. To see last night’s recap, scroll down to the second blue header.

24 Day 7: 3pm-4pm

Previously on 24: Dubaku is surprised and outraged to find that Almeida, Bill, and Jack have found his evil lair. Jack find the C.I.P. device. P.M. Matobo insists that they meet with the President. She’s the only person he trusts. First Hubby kills Evil Secret Service dude before he can kill him, and ESS’s back up arrives and receives instructions from Dubaku to bring the First Hubby to him.

The following takes place between 3pm and 4pm.

Evil Secret Service Dude 2 (ESS2) arrives at Dubaku’s other evil lair with the First Hubby.

The President addresses the nation and pretty much says, “Look, bitches… I got this.”

Dubaku is walking through the streets like he’s a regular Joe. He arrives at his new evil lair where his henchmen are waiting with the First Hubby. Dubaku wants to know if he thinks the Pres. loves him enough to call off the strike against his country? I guess we ’bout to find out.

As the address ends, the Pres. is informed that Matobo has arrived with his rescuers. She’s surprised to hear that Bauer is one of the heroes. When they meet, she assures Matobo she is still down for the cause and that the U.S. will help his people. He leaves and the Pres. demands answers from Jack, Agent Walker, and Bill. She doesn’t believe Jack when he says that there are leaks in her administration until he’s like, “Um, why do you think it was so hard for you to catch Dubaku’s ass?” She’s all, “True dat.”

Jack tells the Pres. that they need to work under the radar in order to get Dubaku as he is the only one with knowledge of who the leaks are.

Then showing balls bigger than those chasing Indiana Jones down a cavern, Dubaku calls the Pres. He tells her right away that he has her husband. Dubaku wants the U.S. forces removed from Sangala and he wants Matobo delivered to his men to boot. He wants all this done by 4pm. To prove he means business he orders his men to cut off First Hubby’s finger while she listens.

The Pres. is informed of the scene at her dead son’s fiance’s apartment. Realizing that she can’t ask the American people to make sacrifices she won’t make herself, she refuses to give in.

Jack offers to do what he does best. Fuck shit up. The Pres. wants to know how she can know where Jack’s loyalties really lie.

“With all due respect, Madame President, ask around.”

Yeah, he was all, “Bitch, you better ask somebody!”

Realizing she has no other option and nothing to lose, she agrees to let Jack and Agent Walker (who everyone thinks is dead) try and rescue her husband. They are given their own office in The White House to operate out of. Agent Walker convinces Jack that they’ll need Agent Moss’ help. So she calls him.

“I’m alive, but you can’t let anyone know that.”

What’s the first thing this fool does? Goes into a hallway, presumably for privacy, and as someone turns the corner says all loud, “Renee!” Jackass.

She fills him in on what’s going on with the First Hubby. She suggests they start by tracing the movements of the ESS dude that tried to kill First Hubby. He wants proof she’s not being forced to do this, so he makes her agree to a meet.

Squirrely guy is whispering with his mistress and giving her attitude. Janis warns that he’s way too obvious with it and needs to watch himself. Jack and Agent Walker meet Agent Moss so he can see she’s really alive. Moss informs them that ESS dude was talking a lot to ESS dude 2 and that he used to work in Sangala. Jack wants to know if ESS2 has a family. He does; a wife and an 11-month old son. Jack is like, “We need to make him think we’re gonna hurt his family.”

Moss and Walker balk, but eventually Walker comes around. Moss tells Jack he will not allow Walker to end up like Jack. Like Jack? You mean a badass? Well, sucks for her.

“Rules are what make us better.”

“Not today,” Jack growls.

Cheesy, but it is Jack Bauer and I wouldn’t say that to his face.

Dubaku gets a call from his sweet waitress girlfriend, Marika. She wants to know if they’re still on for dinner and he cancels.  He’s got fingers to cut off, lady!

Marika’s sister, Rosa,  tries to tell her she has no idea who Dubaku is and that she shouldn’t trust him, but she ain’t tryna hear it. Did I miss something? Do these people not have access to Google?

Moss helps Jack get a line on ESS2. They need to get to him before he starts his shift on a military base. Agent Walker arrives at ESS2′s house.  She flashes her gun and tells the wife to shut up and she might live. And I swear that baby looks like he might be a little slow.

If they torture a mildly retarded baby, I’m turning the channel.

ESS2′s baby is screaming his head off. And that’s a lot of screaming. Walker makes the wife cuff herself to the coffee table. And damnit, she looks like she’s enjoying this!

Jack purposely crashes into ESS2′s car then sucker punches him in the face. Jack drags him to an apartment building’s lobby and asks where the First Hubby is. He ain’t talking so Jack calls his wife and lets him hear Agent Walker terrorize his baby.  She doesn’t really, or does she? They won’t show it! He agrees to talk, so Jack hangs up and Agent Walker gives the wife the baby.

“I was just playing.”

After ESS2 gives up the location, he pulls a knife on Jack and they fight. Jack kills him. He then carjacks a nice ride and speeds off.

Bill puts in motion the plan to have a double arrive at the drop and trick Dubaku.  Jack tells Agent Walker that ESS2 is dead and she nearly falls apart looking at his big-head baby. Jack tells her if she can’t handle the heat, perhaps she should do something else. She says she might just do that… but not today.

What’s up with that? That’s twice in one hour. Day 7 is the new Vegas! What happens on Day 7 stays on Day 7!

Squirrely guy is all suspicious because the threat level is lowered yet, as far as they know, the CIP device hasn’t been recovered. Moss tells Squirrely guy to settle down, and that he’ll handle it. Walker calls Moss with the address they believe the First Hubby is being held.

Dubaku gets a call from Rosa and she says she knows he’s not in the country legally. If he doesn’t break up with Marika tonight, he’ll be sorry.
Why is she lobbing threats from a wheelchair! Dummy!

Dubaku grabs a gun and tells his henchmen he has to “go take care of something.”

Dubaku’s men are not fooled by the trick and shoot a rocket at the car holding Matobo’s double. Well, so much for that plan.

Agent Walker and Jack arrive at the evil lair which is in the back of a store. They take out the henchmen just after Dubaku calls and orders they kill the First Hubby. One of them gets off a shot before he dies and it hits the First Hubby in the chest. Jack screams for an ambulance and that’s all I saw because my TiVo shut off.

24 started two minutes late because of the President’s speech. Damn you, Obama!

Tick… tock… tick… tock…

24 Day 7 4pm – 5pm

Previously on 24: Dubaku has The First Hubby who realizes that Dubaku was behind his son’s death. Dubaku tells the Pres. he will kill her hubby if she doesn’t meet his demands. Dubaku’s girlfriend, Marika, has a disapproving sister, Rosa, who threatens to expose Dubaku as a fraud if he doesn’t break up with her sis. Jack and Agent Walker arrive to rescue the First Hubby, but he gets shot in the process.

The following takes place between 4pm and 5pm…

An ambulance arrives to help the First Hubby. They are told they cannot tell anyone who the victim is. Agent Walker searches the hideout for a lead on where Dubaku went. Jack calls the President and informs her of what happened to her husband.

The President wants to go to the hospital to be with her husband. Bill wants her to allow Chloe reinstated and he wants to head up the investigation to find the leaks. He will also serve as her security because the secret service cannot be trusted.

Dubaku arrives at Marika’s job and says they need to talk. He tells her he needs to leave the country right away and he wants her to go too. She is reluctant and he kind of loses his shit for a moment. Her dumb ass agrees to go after he promises that he will eventually send for her sister. She skips off to pack like a goof troop.

Dubaku calls a contact to make sure his exit arrangements are in order. The contact says that General Juma won’t be happy to hear that he has failed his mission and Dubaku is all, “To hell with him!” They make arrangements to meet in 15 minutes.

Walker calls into Moss and he reams her out for terrorizing ESS2′s wife and child. He feels like she’s in too deep. Jack overhears her talking to Moss and tells her they may have a lead on Dubaku.  She shares the address with Moss and they head off.

Marika arrives home and begins to pack. Chloe leaves her hubby and baby to go work in the FBI offices.  She’s not in the office two minutes before she says something inappropriate. Moss tries implying that all the people that have died around Jack were killed because of him. Chloe tells him to worry less about Jack and more about the mole in his office. Oh, snap! No she di-un!

Dubaku meets with his new contact in a hotel lobby. He warns that if anything happens to him or Marika a file with all the dirty secrets will be sent to the Justice Department. Who are all these corrupt white men??

Marika’s sister, Rosa, doesn’t want Marika to leave the country with Dubaku. She doesn’t trust him. Marika accuses Rosa of wanting to deny her happiness and says she is leaving no matter what Rosa says.

Agent Walker and Jack bust in the apartment and demand to know where Dubaku is. They say don’t know any Dubaku. When Jack shows Marika a picture, she lies and says she doesn’t know him. Rosa, on the other hand, drops about a dollar worth of dimes. Jack realizes that Marika has no idea what a monster she’s involved with.

“Do you have any idea what this man is?”

“He’s everything to me.”

Wrong answer.

The Pres. arrives at the hospital to see her husband. He has to have about five hours of surgery and his chances aren’t good.  She’s able to tell him that he was right about their son not killing himself before he goes into surgery. She asks Bill to contact her estranged daughter.

Jack and Agent Walker tell Marika all about Dubaku’s true resume. They want her to talk to him when he calls so that they can trace him. She’s all freaking out and saying that she can’t do it. Heifer, get on the phone! She eventually does and pretends that she’s upset because she fought with her sister. He tells her a car will be coming for her.

Jack asks that she go when the car arrives and tells her that they’ll be following a mile behind. Rosa doesn’t want her to go, but Marika says it’s the right thing to do. Jack calls into Moss who puts him on with Chloe. She says she’ll set up the trace on Marika’s phone, but it will take longer than usual because Moss’ system is ass backwards. Couth-less Chloe strikes again! Janis, meanwhile, is trying to peek at what Chloe is doing, but keeps getting denied.

Aaron is back! Kick-ass secret service Aaron is sent to get the Pres.’ daughter, but she refuses to go with him when he arrives at the hotel lobby where she’s meeting with a client. He tells her about her father being shot and they leave. She’s annoying already.

Janis blackmails Squirrely guy into helping her get a look at what Chloe is doing.

“You’re a little bitch, you know that?”

“You’re a little bitch,” she counters.

You’re both little bitches.

Marika is going along in the car Dubaku sent and Jack and Agent Walker follow behind. Chloe’s trace is interrupted when Janis, who was spying, has to sever the connection so as not to get made.  Moss, Chloe, and Jack know someone was mirroring Chloe’s actions.

Local police fall in on Jack and Agent Moss and arrest them. Moss gets on the phone to try and stop it when Chloe discovers a warrant was issued for them by Moss’ office. Janis opens her big mouth and tells Squirrely guy that Chloe is working with Jack to trace a car on its way to Dubaku. As soon as she takes her dumbass to her desk, Squirrely guy makes a call. He calls Dubaku’s contact that he met with earlier.  He, in turn, calls Dubaku and tells him that his girlfriend has been turned. Dubaku says he’ll take care of her.

Tick… tock… tick… tock.

24 Day 7: 2pm-3pm

Previously on 24: The President gets word from the NSA that there was another firewall breach; the CIP device has been used again. Dubaku causes two planes to crash midair. Evil Secret Service dude kills the fiancé, but dies when The First Hubby turns the tables on him. The FBI considers the possibility that Agent Walker may be dead. Jack convinces Matobo and his wife to go along with the switch so that they can help them track down Dubaku and the CIP device. Dubaku sets his sights on Ohio.

And now…

The following takes place between 2pm and 3pm….

The squirrelly guy may have figured something out and Janis Gold may have figured out something else, but I’m completely distracted by his squirreliness and Janeane Garofalo’s bad acting to hear what it is.

The White House is still trying to reach The First Hubby, but his Evil Secret Service dude ain’t answering his phone ’cause his evil ass is dead.

Jack and the crew are tracking the truck carrying the Matobos. Meanwhile, they arrive at Dubaku’s evil headquarters. We know they’re really evil by all the computer screens, flashing lights, and stone-faced flunkies standing around. Dubaku tells Mr. Matobo he will cooperate with him and implies bad things will happen to his wife if he doesn’t.

Jack, Tony, and Bill (finally, Bill gets some action!!) head for the roof of the evil headquarters while Agent Walker uses her FBI creds. to waltz through the front door and give the rooftop crew access. Chloe gives Jack and Agent Walker directions and they scurry through crawlspaces.

Janis figures out that Dubaku has targeted an insecticide plant in Ohio. She gets on the horn to warn them and squirrelly guy looks mighty turned on by her forcefulness. Like, maybe he should be cheating on his wife with her and not the useless blonde.

The President finds out what Dubaku is up to in Ohio. Will anyone really miss 30.000 Ohioans?

Janis tries to talk the plant manager through either stopping the pressure from rising or at the very least, slowing it down. I really like this guy. Too bad his ass will probably be dead before the hour is up. Damn, just as I typed that, he went on a suicide mission. Poor bastard.

Dubaku realizes Jack and crew are there and Dubaku wants to tuck tail and run. His FBI cohort wants to keep going. They begin to shut down their operations and stop the Ohio attack. So, um, the plant manager just poisoned himself for nothing?

Jack and company open up their attack on Dubaku and his men. Dubaku is at a disadvantage because he’s in a room with lots of flashing lights and computer monitors. A couple of shots set off explosions off behind him. Dummy. Agent Walker rescues the Matobos after killing the FBI cohort, and Jack, Tony, and Bill take care of Dubaku’s men. They find the CIP device destroyed, but no Dubaku. Jack orders a sweep.

After the crisis is averted, Janis realizes that the plant manager is still in trouble and signals for a rescue team. And her acting is still really bad.

As they search for Dubaku, he snatches up the firewall physicist guy (remember him?! I didn’t!) and threatens to kill his family if he doesn’t do what he says. When Jack and crew arrive, Dubaku detonates explosives he had attached to the physicist guy. That ain’t right. Jack loses Dubaku in the confusion, but has to leave because the police are almost there.

Notice how every season, even though Jack is the good guy, he finds himself avoiding the law?

Moss and the squirrelly guy are trying to figure out why the Ohio attack suddenly stopped. I guess they never heard of counting their blessings. Moss orders squirrelly guy to figure out where the CIP was being used, and he delegates that to Janis who is all in mourning over the plant manager. And her acting is still really bad!

The White House remains confused as to why the attack suddenly stopped, but they want to find out. The Chief of Staff orders the Secret Service to send men to the First Hubby’s last known location; the dead son’s fiancé’s (who is now also dead) apartment. The back-up evil Secret Service dude hears the call out over his earpiece and rushes upstairs. He stops First Hubby from escaping, but gets a call from Dubaku (!?!) before he can kill him. Dubaku orders the First Hubby brought to him. Awww, snap!

Back at the safe house, Jack tries to convince Bill that they can no longer work without help. Matobo wants to call the President for help, but Bill warns they can’t trust the people around the President. Tony doesn’t seem to like that idea and now he looks squirrelly too! I don’t trust anyone!!

Matobo tells the President that he is safe, the CIP device is destroyed, and that he’ll only speak with her in private. Why he doesn’t give her a heads up that there are traitors in her midst is beyond me. They agree to meet at the White House in ten minutes.

Tony tells Jack he’s not coming with him. He did some bad, bad, things before he saw the light and his ass don’t wanna go to jail. Bill is all, “True dat.” Tony gives his word that he’ll turn himself in when this is all over.

As the hour ticks down the First Hubby is being put into the trunk of a car, Jack and Bill are headed for the White House with Matobo, and Dubaku arrives at his new evil headquarters where he is met by… his really normal, kinda cute, very sweet, waitress girlfriend?! WTF?!

I predict Jack Bauer will be torturing her ass by 6pm. What say you?

Tick…tock…tick… tock…

24 – Day 7: 1pm-2pm

Previously on 24: Prime Minister Matobo and his wife succumb to the gas and his wife punks out. The First Hubby is double crossed by his Secret Service buddy. He and his son’s fiancé are ’bout to die. Agent Walker gets gripped up by Emerson’s men and is fake killed by Jack so that he can maintain his cover. Soulpatch Tony and Jack are then instructed to bury her.

The following takes place between 1pm and 2pm…

The FBI boss, Moss, is all freaked out ’cause Agent Walker is missing and you just know they’re boning. He gives the Chloe-wannabe an order and she’s all about smart remarks. The squirrelly guy refers to Agent Walker in the past tense and Moss loses his shit on him, “We don’t know that she’s dead yet.”

The real Chloe and Bill show up in the magic blue van to unearth Agent Walker… which brings back all kinds of Laura Palmer memories. She’s not breathing and Bill injects her with adrenaline Pulp Fiction-style.

Emerson tells Jack and Tony how they came to fake Tony’s death and recruit him. They used his anti-government feelings to keep him loyal. Blah, blah, blah. Do we even care? We’re just happy he’s back!

Emerson jumps Jack at the airport hangar thinking that he and Tony are plotting to steal the diamonds. I must not have been paying attention… what diamonds!? Tony shoots Emerson.

Agent Walker wants to contact Moss, but Bill warns that Dubaku has spies in the FBI. He tells her she has to stay dead so they can find the device AND defeat Dubaku AND weed out the spies AND save the world, damnit!

Jack tells Matobo that he’s on his side and he should come with him if he wants to live.

Dubaku tells his FBI guy that when he meets with Emerson and his men, he should kill them and take Matobo. He wants to keep his diamonds instead of paying them to Emerson (ooooh, those diamonds!) The FBI guy leaves to do his evil bidding.

The President refuses to withdraw the troops per Dubaku’s demand. She still has hope that they can recover the C.I.P. device.

Matobo’s wife urges him to go along with Jack’s plan that they allow themselves to be handed over to Dubaku. She wants to make up for being a pussy in the panic room. He agrees because, I suspect, he secretly hates for being a pussy and putting them in this situation to begin with. Tony mourns Emerson’s death, but rallies with Jack to continue the plan. He looks kinda shady if you ask me.

Dubaku calls the President… ah, snap! It’s on! He instructs her to go to the window and there we see the aftermath of two planes colliding. Thank God they didn’t show it actually happening.

Dubaku needs his ass kicked.

The President still refuses to give in. Someone quits. I think it’s her Secretary of State. Oh well, tell him to take his ass back to One Life to Live. The Prez then gives this long speech about how we must not give in to threats, and America must lead, and blah, blah, blah. Then she leaves the room and it doesn’t look like even she believes she’s doing the right thing.

Agent Walker, Chloe and Bill arrive at the airport hangar. Agent Walker is salty that Jack shot her and buried her alive. Um, at least you’re not dead for real, for real. Ungrateful. Chloe puts a tracker in Mr. Matobo’s mouth.

Thr First Hubby sits helpless and evil Secret Service dude sets up the apartment for the staged murder/suicide. The fiancé arrives and gets stabbed repeatedly… it’s horrible.

When the FBI guys show up to make the swap, they try and double cross Tony, but he and Jack light shit up. They’re allowed to leave with the Matobos.

First Hubby regains control of his bodily functions long enough to flip the script on Evil Secret Service dude.

Dubaku prepares to lay another smack down on the U.S. as he realizes the President is not going to bend. “This bitch is crazy!”

Tick tock tick tock…

24: Day 7, 8am-10am

Here’s an early sneak peek review of tonight’s seventh-season opener of 24. It’s a two-night premiere continuing tomorrow at 8pm eastern. Today and tomorrow the reviews will remain spoiler free. Next week Tuesday begins the weekly 24 recaps here at Blog It Out, Bitch.

24 – Day 7: 8am-10am

If you’ve not seen 24 before, shame on you. You should crawl back under your rock, but take DVDs of seasons 1 – 6 with you. You’ll thank me later.

A few weeks ago FOX aired a 2-hour movie, 24: Redemption. In it, we learned that on the eve of the inauguration of the country’s first female President, Allison Taylor (Cherry Jones.), Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) is in Africa avoiding extradition to the U.S. to answer for the actions of the now disbanded CTU (counter-terrorism unit.) Bauer eventually returns to the states in exchange for the safe passage of young African boys being forced to join a rebel militia.

The first hour of tonight’s premiere picks up with 24 badass Jack Bauer testifying before a senate sub-committee as to the torture methods employed by CTU. As this is happening, the engineer behind the government’s homeland firewall is kidnapped by a group of masked men.

Agent Renee Walker of the FBI enlists Jack’s help in discovering what the group, who she has been tracking, wants with the engineer. Why is Jack called in? Because the head of the group is none other than presumed dead former CTU agent, Tony Almeida, or as we like to call him in our house, “Soulpatch Tony.” (Dude, you know he totally rocked a soulpatch in season one.) And before you can say, “questionable methods,” Jack is back to his old self, praise the Lord.

Meanwhile, President Taylor has her hands full trying to decide if the nation is going to war behind the actions of warlord General Juma’s (Tony Todd) actions in Sangala (introduced in Redemption.), and her husband played by Colm “Give me what I want and I’ll go away” Feore, is busy investigating the supposed suicide of their son.

I thought the show had made a mistake broadcasting Tony’s return at the end of Redemption and then again in all the commercials leading up to tonight’s premiere, but I have to say that it didn’t take away the punch of the shocker when Jack finds out his longtime friend is still alive.

Annie Wersching is a nice addition as Agent Walker, who could very well be a female Bauer as she displays a few Bauer-esque moves in tonight’s opener, but I also have a soft spot from her brief stint on General Hospital. I need to see more of Janeane Garofalo’s Janis Gold a.k.a The New Chloe before I can decide if it works or not. It was also nice to see Carlos Bernard back as a harder, colder, Almeida – no matter how far fetched it is.

And though I do miss the old CTU offices and familiar faces, in true 24-style I’m sure we’ll be amongst old friends soon enough, and I can’t wait. Tonight’s second hour packs more action than the first, but it’s a definite must-see for 24 fans. The wait is over. DVR The Golden Globes and get your Bauer on tonight.

P.S. There’s a rumor swirling about that I named my son after Jack Bauer. I refuse to confirm or deny… but you totally couldn’t fault me if I did. Right?

24 premieres tonight at 8pm eastern on FOX.

To read my friend Eric Hegedus’ New York Post interview with Cherry Jones (President Taylor – 24) click here.

My Dad Is Like Chloe O’Brian

A few months into my first semester of school it was decided that it would probably be best for me to obtain a part-time job. I didn’t decide this. The decision was all Donny’s… and our bank account’s.

One of the readers of my blog owns local mortgage company and after I blogged about my sudden need of part-time income, he offered to interview me for an office manager position at his company. I had no interest whatsoever in the mortgage industry, but a job is a job is a job, and the guy offering the job was hot. He looks like Colin Farrell, but unlike Colin he doesn’t look like a walking staph infection.

The interview was scheduled for after an exam for my psychology class. The exam was held at the campus of my school that I refer to as “the ghetto campus.” It’s in the same part of town that houses the weave warehouse and where there are liquor stores, check cashing places, and title loan shops on every block. I hated going there.

As I exited US 78 onto Memorial Drive…

“Why do you always do that?”

“Do what?”

“You always lock your car door right when we get into this neighborhood.”

“Inner self, not now, I’m running late for my exam and then I have an interview. Don’t fuck with me.”

“I’m not fucking with you. I just think it’s funny that you think somebody wants this raggedy ass Saturn.”

If I kill my inner self, will I die too?

On the way to the interview, I called my Dad. My Dad and I have this silly thing where if one of us is out driving and needs directions, we’ll call the other and refer to them as CTU from the TV show 24.  You know how Jack Bauer is always calling in saying things like, “Chloe, I need you to uplink me to the mainframe server with level 5 access.”  Well, when I call my Dad and vice versa it’s, “CTU, you got your map book handy?”

After he confirmed that I was going in the right direction he said, “You know, I woke up this morning with a bad feeling.  How do you know this is legit? What if this is some elaborate scheme to get you to meet them?”  My Dad’s a retired NYC detective. The fact that it took him a week to get suspicious means he’s slipping.

I assured him that I’d be fine, but of course by then I was worrying too. To be safe, once I found the building I called Donny to give him my exact coordinates.  See, if my husband were black, that wouldn’t have happened.  He’d have put a lo-jack on my ass the moment I left the house. Poor Donny didn’t even know what part of town I was in till I called him.

Once the interview was over I called my Dad from the car.

“How’d it go?”

“Well, I didn’t get gang raped so I guess it went well.”

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