Nina’s Top Ten Failed TV Show Ideas

As I prepared a spreadsheet of the new fall shows I’d be programming into my three TiVos (don’t judge me), I found some interesting shows that didn’t make the fall line-up. Did the networks make a mistake? You decide.

10. Made Off With Your $ – A new reality show centered around convicted Ponzi scheme scammer, Bernie Madoff (pronounced Made-Off) as he adjusts to going from the penthouse to the big house. The pilot revolved around Bernie and a misunderstanding with his new cellmate; a big black guy called M.T. (Meat Tenderizer.) – (MTV)

9.  Two Guys, A Girl, and a Pregnancy Test – Judd Apatow brings his unique brand of humor to the small screen. Stacy has two one night stands within days of each other. When both the responsible Tom and the party boy Chad decide to move in with her until they can figure out who the daddy is, hilarity ensues. (ABC)

8. More Bootay To Love – Motivated by complaints that dating shows ignore the overweight and minorities, FOX decided to mix things up with a Bachelor-style reality show pairing up overweight black couples.

7. Where in the World Is Michael Jackson? – Yet another reality show (hey, they’re cheap) obsessed with celebrity. This time, a dead one. All this controversy over where The Gloved One will be buried has sparked a group of ghost-hunter style adventurers to track down the corpse once and for all.(The CW)

6. So You Think You Can Whittle? -  The search for America’s Favorite Whittler begins! A panel of expert judges scour the country to see who can really handle their wood!

5. Sex - Knowing what sells and in a desperate attempt to garner controversy-driven ratings, NBC airs the closest thing to pornography that the FCC will let them get away with. No plot, just constant love scenes back-to-back… and front-to-t0… and…

4. Big Brother: West Virginia – Twelve people in one house constantly followed by cameras. Eight teeth between them. One major twist – the people who hook up are not related! (CBS)

3. America’s Got Talent – Washed up has-been “celebrities” like David Hasslehoff and Sharon Osbourne serve as judges to the millions of Americans who think balancing plates on your head and whistling the National Anthem through your nose makes you talented. …. Oh… wait. (NBC)

2. Touched by An Uncle – CBS, hoping to cash in on the popularity of Law and Order: SVU, came up with their own crime-fighting unit dedicated to children sex crimes.

1. Are You Smarter Than Sarah Palin? - Every episode, every week, the answer is yes.

Have an idea for a top ten? Email it to nina@blogitoutb.com