The L Word: Season 6, Epi.6 – Lactose Intolerant

The L Word: Lively

Apparently theme parties are all the rage and that is why Jenny throws Max a Willa Wonka baby shower. More disturbing than seeing a little girl turn into a blueberry is Jenny’s monstrous behavior towards Max, Helena, and  Jamie.  It’s bad enough that Tom left Max high and dry, and pregnant , but he has got to deal with all the ladies saying what an asshole Tom is. Max doesn’t agree and excuses Tom by saying that he was just scared. It’s not everyday that a gay man impregnates his pre-op trans boyfriend. It’s either flight or fight and Tom decided to fly and change both his numbers.  Maybe the ladies are right.

If that’s not bad enough, Jenny keeps referring to Max as a woman the whole time and Tina is a little annoying with questions about birth plans and the benefits of breastfeeding. If he could, Max would probably lop off his breasts with a Wonka bar.

I totally would.

Instead, he gets on his knees and begs Bette and Tina to adopt his child. They are honored, but dismissive because they think Max is just panicking. Besides they have plans to adopt a different child.

Was Jamie trying to get Shane to be there for Alice because once she steals Tasha, Alice will definitely need a shoulder to cry on? We never really got to the end of that conversation because Jenny totally cockblocked.  How malicious was Jenny when it came to telling Dylan about last week’s test at Hit?  When Dylan finds out, she leaves Helena who spends the rest of the episode drunk as a skunk.  We have another threat against Jenny’s life when Helena says to Shane, “I’m gonna fucking  kill your girlfriend!” It carries a little bit of weight, especially since Helena is an ex-con.

I'll have another...and another...another.

Bette and Tina encounter a complication with their pending adoption. The potential birth mother is from Nevada, which is one of the few states that does not allow gay couples to adopt. Joyce found a loophole, two actually. The first Bette was totally against: Adopting the child as a single parent and have the second parent adopt once they are back in California. The second was to have Marci, the birth mother, move to California, have her baby while living with Bette and Tina and then they would both be able to adopt him.  They decide to go with the latter since it doesn’t involve starting their baby’s life off with a lie. Meanwhile Bette and Kelly have their gallery opening as Wentworth Porter makes its debut. Unfortunately Tina can’t make it because she is in New York on business.

After the love triangle goes out for a run, Tasha catches a glimpse of a naked Jamie and immediately jumps Alice’s sweaty bones. In the time it takes Jamie to take a shower, Alice and Tasha do it on the couch. They are not as  quick or as quiet as they think and Jamie stands in the hallway listening. There is a look on her face that seems like she’s amused, confused, intrigued, and a even a little interested, but at the time, I still don’t know which girl she’s interested in. That all changes later at Jamie’s house when she makes a point to ask Tasha what she thinks of her dress and much later when she and Tasha bond when talking about their very similar childhoods.  Looks like Jamie might be helping Tasha with more than just her endurance test for the police academy.

What? I like Tasha.

Jenny buys Shane a photography studio. While giving Shane the tour, one thing that stood out to me is that Jenny  said, “… so you don’t have to ask anyone for a favor ever again.”  I get the feeling that she is setting Shane up and making sure she’s taken care of for the future. Is her suicide premeditated? And why not buy Shane a hair salon instead? That’s what she’s really good at, but I guess that would involve Shane doing women’s hair and we know what Shane would really be doing.

Who me?

Sunset finds out that Kit and Helena are just business partners and not partner partners. “My body doesn’t respond to its own kind,” Kit tells him as she rubs his biceps. Sure he was clad in Madonna’s Like a Virgin wedding dress at the time, but it was most action Kit’s gotten in a long time. Later, Sunset, out of drag and unrecognizable to Kit,  told her that she was “one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen and I would love nothing more than to take her home with me tonight and wake up in the morning with her arms and legs wrapped around me.” As soon as he got the monologue out, from the fantasy Kit shared with him as Sunset, he got a face full of wine.

Don't play with me!

Kelly “Sabotage” Wentworth cries wolf about an oyster crisis at work to get Bette off the phone with Tina. She claims to be worried that there won’t be enough oysters for all the guests. Luckily, Bette sees through her transparent scheme. Kelly tells Bette that Tina should be more supportive and not off in New York on business. Then she pretty much calls Tina Bette’s wife and Bette scoffs at the idea and schools Kelly on the kind of relationship she and Tina really have.

We support each other.

As Shane sucks down one of the aforementioned oysters at Bette’s opening, Jenny tells her why she doesn’t eat oysters. “It reminds me of a guy coming in my mouth.” Nice.

I do not eat oysters.

Shane almost loses it (and by it, I mean the oyster), but doesn’t and it turns out to be a sweet, funny moment between the two of them. The oysters rear their ugly heads again after Shane sneaks out with Nikki, starts to make out with her, only to stop short for what I thought was a moment of clarity, but turns out to be food poisoning. Nikki bolts once the going gets tough, leaving Shane high and dry, and puking, with no one else to call but a frantic Jenny. Jenny takes care of Shane and promises to “always be there for her,” before she spies on Bette and Kelly through the window.

Of course,  Jenny misses when a very inebriated Kelly shows up at Bette’s door, drunkenly hits on her, gets rebuffed, and accidently breaks a glass. But catches them just in time to see Bette bend down to clean up the glass. Unfortunately (for Bette) from Jenny’s point of view, it looks like Bette and Kelly are sharing an intimate moment. Then Jenny does what any true friend would do, she takes a picture, you know, for proof.

Do you think that Jenny is planning a future for Shane? Do you think Tasha is going to leave Alice for Jamie? Will Kit get with Sunset? Will Bette and Tina end up adopting Max’s child? Did Jenny Schecter kill Jenny Schecter?

The L Word airs Sunday nights on Showtime at 9pm. (Only two episodes left in the final season – eeeeek!)